Shibari Emotional Management

Rope bondage is about the erotics and its aesthetics, but it is also about shibari emotional management. As you might as well know from our previous entries, it is indispensable for anyone practicing shibari to become in contact with their emotions. And to do so in a healthy way. For this reason, we will explain how shibari emotional management works and how that benefits you and your partner.

Brief Introduction to the Discipline

Shibari is followed by the last name Kinbaku—if this were possible with Japanese traditions. Allow us to explain further. Shibari means “to tie” and kinbaku refers to something beyond: to the art of tying and everything that comes into play between two people at the moment. Patricia Díaz Saco, a sexologist member of the State Association of Sexology Professionals, says that “there are many people with great skills but, although the technique is a very important part, it is not everything.”

Shibari Emotional Management: Know Thyself

Practicing shibari, you can reach unknown places to yourself. Peoples vulnerabilities emerge, including those who bind. The practitioners of shibari assume physical and emotional risks. It is very important to remember that we are tying a person, not a mannequin. Therefore, there is no place for showing off.

For Díaz Saco, the ideal rigger would thus be a person who knows himself, who understands his skills, both technical and emotional management, who accepts and moves within them and who strives to improve them. That is, a person who ties another one whom s/he respects (in every sense of the word). The people involved should knows the risks. For this reason, they too should decide together who takes on. You do not tie someone: you tie yourself with someone.

Tying Yourself With Someone: Shibari Emotional Management

Shibari is a diverse practice. You need to take into consideration who ties and who provides their services. Similarly, you must know who offers his/her body for tying. In addition, you should be clear that, in this community, there are those who tie and are tied by the desire of audiovisual products. And that there are, too, those who do so for a more emotional and experimental reason. For example, many models and actresses in Japan have a contract for each of the hairs that fall out during the work session. Moreover, they are careful of every each inch of skin that ends with marks at the end. Therefore, in many productions, ties are not real, but seem to be so.

In conclusion, shibari is a big responsibility that needs both knowledge and practice.

Image: Ana Blumenkron

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