The Importance of Negotiation in Shibari

The importance of negotiation in Shibari can never be overestimated. It is essential, just as in any other BDSM practice. Negotiation is one of the most important things you need to do if you are practicing Shibari. Negotiation should always take place before a scene. Although people think that you negotiate only once if you are practicing with the same partner, your negotiation may change. You have the right to decide what you are happy to do or not to do during each rope scene. Therefore, it is important to negotiate before every practice. The more you negotiate, the better you will become at communicating your needs.

Negotiations include everything you can think of. And it is necessary in practice, workshops, play, or performances. Negotiation will give you expectations and ground rules for the scene, it will also give you anticipation and planning before the scene, and it can deffinitely be enjoyable.

Although people think negotiation only includes the bottom, negotiation is about both. During the negotiation, the bottom will tell how the rigger is, if the riggers put pressure on the bottom to do something they have said they don’t feel comfortable doing while negotiating, the bottom might think twice before allowing that person to tie them.  Although there are no guarantees on how safe you will be if you are playing with someone for the first time, negotiation is the first way to meet the rigger, and you need to use your own judgement and listen to your instinct. If you don’t feel safe, it is better to say No.

Negotiation can cover anything you want to discuss before rope, including if you want aftercare or if you need anything afterwards. Discuss anything you consider important.

Now you know the importance of negotiation in Shibari.

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