Shibari With the Wrong Person
Shibari has mostly to do with trust, whether you are doing it with your lover, a bondage partner, as a performance, or for a photoshoot. Shibari is an interaction between two people, where the bottom relies on the top. Both rigger and bottom need to know their own responsibilities within the scene. So, what to do if you do Shibari with the wrong person?
As we have already talked, communication is very important before during and after a Shibari scene. It is always important to tie and play with people who agree to communicate about the risks. A bottom must demonstrate the capacity and willingness to take their own responsibility during the scene. Doing Shibari with the wrong partner can leave a very bad experience behind. Whether you are a new practitioner or an experimented practitioner, you will have good and bad partners. A good or bad Shibari partner has nothing to do with knowledge or experience, but with the interaction between partners.
A bad partner could be a partner that does not trust the rigger. How can this happen if the clue in Shibari is trust? Well, some people practice Shibari for the first time with their partners, which they trust. However, it is not the same to trust them in normal life than to trust them while you are tied. This is just a problem of communication between partners, it is important to have trust and confidence with your partner during a Shibari scene.
Another bad partner could be someone who gives the rigger the full responsibility and if something goes wrong blames it all to him. Shibari is between two people, where both have their own responsibilities and both are taking the risk.
You will definitely enjoy more having a good partner than a bad partner. Try to discuss everything prior to the scene, and if something does not sound good and there is a little friction or mistrust, it is better to choose another partner.
You might have already chosen a bad partner and you learned during the scene, but that gives you experience to not make the same mistake again.
