Submission of an Empowered Woman

Some people worry that Shibari is not compatible with the new female type: the empowered woman. Therefore, we decided to interview a young woman we’ll call Mandy and explore how the submission of an empowered woman is possible nowadays.

The first question was: Why do you consider yourself an empowered woman?

Mandy: Well, to begin with, I’m financially independent. I’m also free from traditional gender stereotypes. I acknowledge myself as a kinky person. And even though I’ve been in a relationship for the past three years, I’m not emotionally attached to any one person. For me, that’s how you live the ideal of the empowered woman, which we hear so often these days.

Our next question was: Do you see a contradiction in being an empowered woman and playing a submissive role in your relationship?

Mandy: Not at all. I mean, first of all, there’s a context. I’ve been kinky since I was a teenager, and I always enjoyed playing the submissive role. You see, submissive doesn’t mean helpless. There is actually a lot of power in the sub. However, it’s not physical power; it’s more the psychological fact that you are the number one priority of your Dom. Their thoughts, their actions, their words are yours in the first place. If that’s not a kind of power, I don’t know what it is.

Finally, we asked her: Is submission changing as women are changing?

Mandy: I don’t think either one of them is changing. I’d say we’re getting a better understanding of both. We had a very clear idea of what men wanted a woman to be, and now we’re adding to that what women think a woman should be. And it’s the same with kink. Instead of just calling it weird and sick, we’re understanding deviant sexuality in its own terms.

Anything you want to add?

Mandy: I would like women to understand that they can be empowered and kinky, that they can have a committed relationship and yet be independent and free.

That’s what Mandy told us abut the submission fo an empowered woman.