The Day I Asked for Kink

Introducing Shibari into a relationship is not easy, especially if the other person has never tried kink. However, the initiation of your partner into alternative practices can be one of the best experiences for any kink enthusiast. Not to mention that it is always best to show your true self from the beginning. The moment of asking your partner for kink for the first time is one of the most heart-rushing experiences you can have. In this article, under the heading “The Day I Asked for Kink,” we gather the experience of three different people. We hope you find their words useful.

Jerry (bartender, 27): “I meet all kinds of people at my job. My girlfriend turned out to be a girl who had barely set foot in a bar before. I guessed that’s what I liked about her, that she’s actually quite vanilla. As for me, I’ve been a kink enthusiast for almost ten years now. So, after six months of dating, I asked my girlfriend for a bondage session. At first, she seemed uncomfortable. So, I took a lot of time to explain to her what it was all about. And we started with something simple. I didn’t want her to feel overwhelmed.”

Ralph (college teacher, 37): “Nobody expects a college teacher to be kinky. I don’t know why. After all, we’re normal people, in spite of our diplomas. Anyway, I got involved in a relationship with a fellow teacher who is ten years my junior. When I explained to her what Shibari is and how much I wanted to do a scene with her, she took a step back—literally and psychologically. I have not mentioned the topic again. A responsible partner understands when someone is just not into kink.”

Yessica (gamer, 26): “I would have never asked my girlfriend for kink if she hadn’t also been part of the gaming community. Among gamers, I do and say things that I would never dare in the ‘real world.’ I think that there must be mutual trust before you ask your partner for something kinky.”