Articles

Good Ropes and Bad Ropes

First, the bad ropes. My divorce was a mess. I lost my job, gained a few pounds, got depressed and in debt. The crappiest part of my life. That’s when I knew that owing the place you live in, the bed on which you sleep, the food you eat, is like having a corset around…
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Dominance

A dominant person, in one of the most common BDSM misconceptions, is someone who is loud and brash. However, this is a stereotype that we should challenge in order to attain a more accurate, better view of what a dominant person is. Dominance should be more related to good leadership. And good leadership involves skill,…
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Shibari is not a Cheap Trick

This was back in the 80s, when we barely knew anything about Shibari. We were young and arrogant, the perfect yuppies. And we though that Japanese bondage was simply the fact that some Japanese are so weird as to tie their girls before sex, instead of just enjoying things. Later, I would find out that…
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Shibari and Vulnerability

It was hell on Earth! My husband had been in Afghanistan for six months. Then, one day, I received a message that almost killed me: he had been captured by the enemy. That’s when my own, personal hell began. And it lasted for four months. Until one day, an army officer came to see me.…
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A Forgotten Sensation

It had been so long ago that I barely remembered. It had turned into a forgotten sensation. I was thirteen, and bold as hell. I played football with the boys, without asking for any special treatment. It’s a funny age. You know how it is. In the morning you want to kiss a boy, and,…
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Negotiation

Negotiation is an open, constructive discussion which takes place before a Shibari scene. Participants must express clearly and specifically their interests, desires, comfort levels and boundaries. In the end, negotiation sets the terms for a commitment between partners. It is, therefore, very important to keep communication open and honest during negotiation. This is the only…
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Shibari Is Interesting

My name is David and I’m a gameholic. I admit it, I have a problem, an addiction, actually. I’ve tried to get rid of it, I’ve really tried, but it is stronger than me. It almost cost me my marriage, but thanks to Shibari it is not a problem anymore. And that is because Shibari…
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Shibari Is not Humiliating

It was awful. I thought it was normal. And I thought everybody did it. Damn! I should have thought twice. Had I know Shibari is not humiliating, it would have saved me a lot of trouble. My girlfriend and I went to a hotel to have some quality time together. While she was getting comfortable…
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Favorite Shibari Fantasy

I’m not a professional rigger, although some true masters, after seeing my work, have told me that I have the potential to become a kinbakushi. I’d rather keep Shibari for myself. I find it extremely exciting, and I’ve practiced it with all my girlfriends who have consented to it. (Remember: it always has to be…
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Vanilla and Kinki

Vanilla and Kinki are not opposites, but rather the extremes of a continuous that go from the more conventional kind of sex practices to the weirdest. It is important that you know them, so that you can enjoy a wider diversity in your intimate life. Vanilla means normal. Now, remember that the definition of normal…
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