No One Had Done Before

Eventually, all couples who are getting serious have to talk about past experiences. It’s not easy, of course. But if you refuse to have this conversation, sooner or later it will explode in the worst possible way. I know because that’s more or less what destroyed my first marriage. We convinced ourselves that whatever had happened before was not important now. And we painfully learned that it actually is. It’s not that you judge the past, but you still have to know. Especially because all people who loved each other at some point wondered if there’s something no one had done before with their partners.

So, when things began getting serious with Ashley, I was afraid to make the same mistake again. On the other hand, I didn’t want to show myself as a judgmental person. I wouldn’t ask her to sit down and discuss the matter. Instead, I would move ahead and try to have a unique experience together.

Without asking directly, I tried to find out whether she had done a bondage scene before or at least played with ropes in some way. It turned out that, although she was kinky and had been involved in a years-long relationship with a Dom, they had never tried bondage.

Then, I asked her to do a Shibari scene with me. I explained everything to her, and it was nice to see that all this was new to her. I promised myself to do my best. Not only was I going to do something no one had done before with her, I was going to give her the experience of a lifetime.

And it worked! I could see the wonder, the excitement, and the fear all mixed together in her eyes as I proceeded to tie her and hang her in a beautiful suspension scene.

There’s no need to ask about the past now. And we’re both eager to take the next step.

This is my Shibari story.