Common Mistakes during the Development

Just like in any other activity, there are some common mistakes in Shibari. After all, it is a human activity, and we humans are “wonderfully fallible”, as a very wise person said. But, wonderful as they are, we all prefer not to make mistakes. That’s why in this article we have compiled some of the most common mistakes during the development of a Shibari scene, so that you can be aware of them and avoid them.

Mistakes can occur during the preparation, the development, and even the aftercare of a scene. Some of them, of course, are more serious than others, but you should try to avoid all of them.

Common mistakes during the development of a scene begin with a rigger who’s not properly focused on the task. Tying up someone is a serious deal. Therefore, the person who’s doing it should be fully concentrated on what they’re doing. Likewise, a bottom whose mind is somewhere else cannot let the rigger know whether things are going well or not.

Lack of communication is perhaps the most common of the mistakes during the development of a Shibari scene. While, as we said in another article, participants should avoid chitchat, it’s just as important they keep in touch with each other while they’re doing the tying. Silent partners are not welcome when it comes to Shibari.

Another common mistake is the refusal to acknowledge that things are going wrong. Nobody wants to make mistakes. This leads to a situation where pride is stronger than safety. And that’s a sure recipe for disaster. If something—anything at all—is going wrong, the best you can do is tell your partner about it.

Finally, lack of emotional connection, while it may not lead to the emergency room, can ruin or, at least, embitter the experience of the scene. Partners are sharing a special experience. Therefore, they should openly share their emotions.