Chubby Chandra

“Chubby Chandra”, that’s what they used to call me. And by “they”, I mean everybody. My parents and my friends called me Channy. But ever since I was a kid, because my obesity problem began when I was just a child, people have called me Chubby Chandra.

It’s not easy to grow up like that. Undeniably, anyone can stand having a nickname; it can even be nice, if it’s a gesture of friendship. However, when people reduce your whole personality to a couple of words, it becomes hell.

For example, there was this girl, Samantha “Sammy” Nicholas. I don’t know why, but Sammy always had a grudge against me. It was unbearable! She would devote time and effort to ruin every joy I had, big or small. Parties, boyfriends, games, good notes—you name it! It was all ruined by Sammy singing loudly “Chubby Chandra! Chubby Chandra!”.

As you can imagine, I didn’t have a normal life. Actually, they threw me into the margins of life. Forced to be an outsider, I discovered the alternatives to the mainstream way of life. That’s how I learned about kink. By the time I was in my 20s, I had totally embraced an alternative lifestyle.

I became a rigger. And it was great! It didn’t matter if I was fat, or if I liked women instead of men; I was welcomed, respected, and admired. You can say what you want about the kinky lifestyle, but, for people like me, it has been a lot more friendly than its mainstream counterpart.

And so it came the day when, in a Shibari exhibition, I saw Sammy among the public. She didn’t recognize me. No problem; I’m used to being forgotten. But I did recognize her. I asked her to volunteer for me, and I tied her up.

It was fantastic! I almost had an orgasm on stage. As in my victim fantasies, I kept the worst of my bullies restrained. And she even thanked me for it!

This is my Shibari story.