Safe Spaces

Mac MacLaughlin is the manager of the “Free the Kink” Facebook group. Earlier this month, he published a brief but valuable statement about creating safe spaces in which a kinky relationship can develop. We consider it so insightful that we are happy to reproduce Mac’s text here.

“Creating a safe and open environment for exploration is essential when engaging in dynamics or play activities. Open dialogue between partners helps ensure the respect of boundaries while exploring one another’s desires. This can include discussing topics such as types of activities, intensity levels, and safety protocols prior to engaging in any activity. Additionally, it is important to check in during and after activities to make sure everyone is feeling comfortable and respected. Through this communication, both parties build trust while feeling secure. They know the other will hear them throughout the experience. Establishing an open dialogue creates a positive atmosphere. This, in turn, allows all partners to comfortably explore their fantasies with confidence.”

Nowadays, we constantly hear about the creation of safe spaces for minorities. However, it is important to understand that any healthy relationship needs such a space. As Mac points out, the idea is to create an environment where partners in a kinky relationship feel free to explore and share.

As always, partners should never understimate the importance of good communication. It is important to note, as Mac recalls, that true communication is dialogue, rather than an overlap of monologues. And there is no taboo topic that is out of the discussion, for that’s the only way to avoid elephants in the room.

On a more practical level, respect and comfort should be verified in each of the activities shared by the partners. You can never take things for granted.

This and other texts from Mac McLaughlin can be found in the “Free the Kink” Facebook group.